Anger Management

My heart races strong enough to ring the bells.
Hands shaking at such an alarming pace.
Nothing a hospital could prescribe could sedate this foul state of mind.

Taking someone's idea.
What a novel idea!
But you're not that smart are you?
Made up of "deep thoughts" on your "subconscious canvas."
Correct spelling isn't enough to comprehend an understanding of what you "think" you're saying.

Hurting someone to do nothing but hurt.
To hear the crash, to feel the burn.
Numb out, be the hardest mother fucker you can be.
You'll find yourself in an empty shell.

Belittle, belittle, belittle.
The warmest security blanket that always leaves your feet cold.
Would you even recognize your shadow?
Is this who you thought you'd be?

It's easy to be fake.
Being real is difficult.
Especially when it involved things that tend to make it more complicated.
Or is it just a form of self sacrifice?
After all, you're putting aside your own discomfort for a moment of an illusion of peace.
So just be an artist.
Cover up the truth with some kind of story.
Or use your art to tell the truth.
The art of war is dead.
It's every man for himself these days.

Using someone's feelings.
To destroy them.
To destroy opportunity.
To destroy sanity.
All for what?
The thrill of the pain you cause?
Isn't love more rewarding?
Or is love more pungent when you realize your power?
Blood thirsty bastard.
It'll never fill the void you lust for.

Unfulfilled potential.
How can you start fresh if you don't allow yourself the opportunity?
Unsaid words can haunt more than anything you've ever said.
Don't surpress these feelings.
I don't fit in that box.
How can you know until you try?
Is it that hard to admit that you were wrong about something the world itself couldn't convince you of otherwise?
To be able to lock it out.
Like it was never there.
Oh, you never deserved my best.
It's the hardest lesson to teach.
And even harder to learn.
Ah, this universe and it's verdicts.
But everything happens for a reason, right?

I understand that I'm absolutely talking in circles.

Calm the fuck down.
Breathe.
Breathe.
Breathe.
It's the best remedy we have.

Maybe I'm just bitter.
Or the only hypocrite brave enough to say something about it.